Look Who’s Barking





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Teleplay by: Curtis Kheel, Monica Breen, Alison Schapker.
Thanks to http://www.twiztv.com/scripts/charmed/


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[Scene: Manor. Living room. Phoebe is sitting on the couch with the Book of Shadows. She is gluing pictures of Cole in the Book of Shadows. She writes “Cole’s human form” on the page. Prue walks in the manor.]

Phoebe: Why didn’t you invite him in?

Prue: Who?

Phoebe: Your date. The guy you’ve been smooching on the porch for the last ten minutes.

Prue: Eavesdropping were you?

Phoebe: Well, I’m single again, so I have no choice but to live vicariously through your love life.

(Prue walks in the living room.)

Prue: Wow, I’d forget about my love life if I were you, lately mine’s been rated PG for pretty grim.

Phoebe: That’s because no one ever makes it through the threshold, Prue. And don’t get me wrong, I’m glad that you’re out there looking, but you can’t keep saving yourself for Mr. Right. I need more vicarious thrills than that.

Prue: I am not saving myself for Mr. Right. I mean, Mr Interesting would do, or Mr. Personality, or even Mr. Take-My-Breath-Away. I don’t care.

Phoebe: Ooh, be careful with the last one. They tend to surprise you in all the wrong ways.

(Prue reads the page Phoebe’s making.)

Prue: “Cole likes walks in the park, jazz and fine wine.” Phoebe, what are you doing?

Phoebe: Well, Cole’s a demon. We write about demons in the Book of Shadows, don’t we?

Prue: Right, but this kind of stuff? Do you really think that’s necessary?

Phoebe: Yeah, if it prepares future witches in case he attacks. Absolutely. I mean, the more that they know about Cole, the better chance they have of hurting him before he hurts them.

Prue: Do you wanna talk about it?

Phoebe: No, there’s nothing to talk about. I loved, I lost and now I’m moving on.

(They hear an explosion.)

Prue: What was that?

Phoebe: Piper.

(They go into the kitchen.)

Prue: Where is she?

Phoebe: In the bunker formerly known as the basement.

Prue: I thought she was getting a handle on her new powers.

Phoebe: Yeah, that was before her new powers got a handle on her. (She knocks on the basement door.) Piper!

Piper: What?

Phoebe: Are you okay?

Piper: I’m fine. The Christmas decorations are not.

[Cut to the basement. There is stuff all over the floor.]

Prue: Can we come down?

Piper: No. Stay away from the door. It’s not safe.

Phoebe: Piper, that’s ridiculous, we’re your sisters.

[Cut back upstairs.]

Phoebe: (to Prue) Maybe we should back up just a little.

(They move away from the door. Dogs start barking from outside.)

Prue: Geez, who let the dogs out?

Phoebe: You can’t stay down there forever.

Piper: Yes I can.

Phoebe: No, you can’t. You have a club to run and a husband who can’t stand to live without you.

Prue: That’s right, and-and two sisters who need you to cook for them and fight evil with them.

Phoebe: Okay, do you want her to come up or do you want her to stay down there?

Prue: Oh.

(Kit hisses.)

Phoebe: What is going on?

(Kit runs through the kitchen knocking over the bin. She runs past Phoebe and Phoebe knocks over some utensils.)

Piper: What was that? What happened?

Phoebe: Uh, nothing, just relax. It was only Kit, don’t blow anything up.

Prue: What the hell is going on out there?

[Cut to a man’s apartment. His little pug dog is looking out the window. It runs over to the man and sits in front of him. It barks. The man is sitting in a chair, flipping through a photo album. He is crying.]

Man: Oh, Catherine. Oh, Catherine, my darling. (The dog continues to bark. Glass objects around the house start shaking.) Rusty, stop it.

(A strange noise gets louder and louder, and everything in the room shakes. The light bulbs blow and all the glass smashes. The windows smash and in flies a Banshee. She lets out a high-pitched scream. The man blocks his ears. The Banshee moves closer to the man and screams in his face. The man covers his face and blood drips down his face.)

Opening Credits

[Scene: Manor. Kitchen. Phoebe is there writing in the Book of Shadows. Prue walks in.]

Prue: Morning.

Phoebe: Morning.

Prue: Uh, you’re not still writing in there about Cole are you?

Phoebe: Nope.

Prue: Good.

Phoebe: I’m actually writing about his demonic half now.

(Prue sits down at the table with a cup of coffee and the paper.)

Prue: Phoebe, I’m-I’m starting to get a little worried about you.

Phoebe: Oh, don’t worry about me, worry about Piper.

Prue: Why? She still locked in the basement?

Phoebe: No, she’s locked herself in her bedroom now.

Prue: Well, at least somebody’s improving. (Prue sees an article in the newspaper.) Huh, looks like we weren’t the only ones annoyed by the dogs barking last night. It says that there was a record number of noise complaints.

Phoebe: Mm-hmm.

Prue: It says here at the exact same time there was a man murdered in our neighbourhood.

Phoebe: Do you mind?

Prue: No motive, nothing stolen, nothing that suggests how he was killed, lots of shattered glass everywhere.

Phoebe: You know this isn’t gonna work, you trying to distract me with…

(Phoebe touches a page in the Book of Shadows and has a premonition. In it, there is a girl in a phone booth. The glass smashes. She covers her face and blood trickles down her face.)

Prue: What?

Phoebe: I saw a little girl. She couldn’t have been any older that fourteen or fifteen. Did you mention something about shattered glass?

Prue: Yeah.

Phoebe: I think you’re right. I think a demon was responsible for that man’s death. (She stands up with the Book of Shadows.) And I think I know which one.

(Phoebe walks into the living room and puts the book on the chair. She clears the table. Prue walks in.)

Prue: Uh, Pheebs, what are you doing?

(Phoebe turns the table onto its side.)

Phoebe: We’ll use the magic to magic spell to summon Cole and then we vanquish him.

Prue: Okay, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, wait. What makes you think that Cole’s responsible?

Phoebe: Because I was holding the Belthazor page when I got the premonition.

Prue: Uh, okay, but shattered glass, and old man, a teenager? That’s not exactly his mo.

Phoebe: Then why else would I get the premonition?

Prue: I don’t know, Phoebe, but I think that you’re barking up the wrong demon. Look, I know that he hurt you but that doesn’t necessarily mean that he’s…

Phoebe: Prue, I can do this with you or without you. Just please, get the vanquishing potion.

Prue: And what if the potion doesn’t work?

Phoebe: It’ll work. It has to.

(Phoebe flips through the book and finds the spell.)

[Cut to the cave underground. Cole is dressed in a black robe. He is chanting.]

Prue, Phoebe: (voice over) “Magic forces black and white. (Wind surrounds Cole.) Reaching out through space and light.”

[Cut to the manor.]

Prue, Phoebe: "Be he far or be he near, bring us the demon Belthazor here.”

[Cut to the cave. Cole is hanging on to a rock.]

Cole: No!

[Cut to the manor]

Prue, Phoebe: “Magic forces black and white, reaching out through space and light, be he far or be he near, bring us the demon Belthazor here.”

(A tunnel of wind appears in the centre of the room.)

Phoebe: Here he comes.

[Cut to the cave. Cole hangs on to the rock. He changes into Belthazor. The wind disappears. He knocks everything off the table. He bangs on the table, angrily.]

[Cut to the manor. The wind tunnel disappears.]

Phoebe: Wait a minute, what happened? Why didn’t it work?

Prue: I don’t know.

(They walk into the middle of the room.)

Phoebe: Damn it!

Prue: Uh, alright, we’re just gonna have to find the girl another way. Was there anything in your premonition that might help?

Phoebe: Dark alley, late at night, phone booth. I mean, there’s not much to go on.

Prue: Okay, so we’ll have to go to the first victims apartment and see if there’s anything there.

Phoebe: Should we get Piper?

Prue: No, let’s not put her anymore on edge then she already is. Come on.

[Cut to Piper’s room. Piper is sitting on the bed meditating. She is listening to a tape.]

Woman on tape: Soft in elevation, slow, deep, exhalation. Be at peace in this world. Allow your mind to drift. Slow.

(Leo orbs in and scares Piper. She blows up her CD player.)

Piper: Leo! You’re supposed to knock, not orb.

Leo: But I live here.

(Piper gets a fire extinguisher and uses it on her CD player.)

Piper: Uhh. (She points it at Leo.)

Leo: Okay, okay, okay, just relax.

Piper: That’s what I was trying to do and then somebody made me blow up my Guru. (Leo moves towards her.) No-no-no. Stay away. I am not safe.

Leo: Piper, come on.

Piper: No, I mean it. My hands are lethal weapons, and I don’t know how to control it and it gets worse every day.

Leo: Well, that’s normal. It took you a while to learn how to control your freezing power, remember?

(He sits down beside her.)

Piper: Freezing is one thing, blowing up stuff is another thing all together.

Leo: Well, except this time you’re not alone. I’m here.

Piper: Yeah, but you shouldn’t be here. You shouldn’t be anywhere near me, it’s too dangerous.

Leo: Then how are we gonna go on our honeymoon?

Piper: We’re not gonna go on our honeymoon, we’re gonna cancel it.

Leo: We are not cancelling our honeymoon.

Piper: Well, then tell the Elders to take this power back, I don’t want it, I’m not ready for it.

Leo: They wouldn’t have given it to you if you weren’t ready for it. I know that both as your Whitelighter and as your husband.

Piper: What if you’re wrong? What if I hurt someone? I just, I feel so helpless.

Leo: One thing you’re not is helpless. You are one of the strongest, most (They lay down on the bed) capable people I have ever known. And don’t forget I’ve been around for a while.

Piper: Really?

Leo: You can handle this, honey. We can handle it together.

Commercial Break

[Scene: Man’s apartment. Prue, Phoebe and an Inspector are there. Prue and Phoebe are looking around.]